Is gossip the new smoking?
As you might know by now, I am a race mechanic and therefor I work with mostly men. When I was younger I thought gossiping was a girl thing, I only hung out with girls so I wouldn’t know different. I was and are not a fan of gossip so when I found my passion and love for cars I thought ‘This will be great! I will work with what I love and it just so happens to be mostly men working the same industry, so I will avoid the gossip and drama that girls bring!’ Of course, I was wrong! I think we can all agree that gossip is not a girl thing or a man thing, it’s a human thing and men are just as bad at it as women.
I bet that everyone have either taken part of work gossip or eavesdropping on other people gossiping. It is intriguing somehow right? If you over hear it you can’t stop listening and if you are apart of it you might have experienced the adrenaline it gives standing in a group of people you might not normally talk to and everyone agrees with you over some silly opinion about a co worker, that this group of people don’t fancy. You might not actually have a problem with this person or lets just say, they way the management runs the business but because you stand in a group and everyone is agreeing, acknowledging your every word, you cant help your self! You keep going, lashing out opinions you don’t even believe in yourself. I know for sure I have done it and felt terrible about it afterwards. It’s an easy way of feeling accepted at work especially if you are an outsider or never really get acknowledgment from the people you are eager to get it from! It is kinda like smoking, back when it was acceptable. You would start a new job, figure out your boss and a lot of your co-worker smokes, everyone except for you! Everyone goes out in the break to smoke and when they come back you feel like you missed out on everything. the latest news, what they did in their weekend and in general missed out on a opportunity to get to know them, maybe the boss talked about a new exciting position that would come up soon and you missed your opportunity to show your interest, simply because you weren’t outside smoking. Its a social thing right? You know its bad for you but it will help you feel accepted in the moment… same with gossip!
I have promised my self not to gossip, if I have a problem I will tell it to the person face to face and I do everything I can to keep that promise to my self but sometimes it can get really difficult. I experience on a daily basic that people come to me to vent, share their opinion about somebody or something and I never really know what to say. I know people need to vent but sometimes it makes me very uncomfortable and I try to stay neutral. I always think to my self ‘If they can talk about other people like that what would stop them talking about you that way’
What is your thought about this? Would you be able to stand in a group of people that are talking about someone behind their back and say “I am not comfortable about this” and leave, knowing you might be the next target? Please share with me your thoughts, I would love to hear them.
Keep smiling x